This was a weekend I had been looking forward to since summer-ish. Or earlier. I lost track because I was so excited for it. 2 big things were in play here: My first time seeing the Toronto Maple Leafs in person and the last UW home football game of the season. Also, they were playing Michigan so it was the last team I needed to see on my tour of Big Ten teams this fall. Also, in the last couple weeks the wife and I decided to invite each of our families to go to the UW-Alaska Anchorage hockey game that Saturday night. So, yeah, lots to gnaw on. Let's get to it.
The shitty thing about this weekend of excellence was that the Leafs game had a 7:30 puck drop in Chicago and the football game had an 11 am kickoff in Madison. Not a lot of wiggle room in there. You may say, "But Hoigaard, really, how early do you have to be in Madison the next day for the game?" Answer? Early. And that's the end of that conversation. But we had a plan to do hockey Friday night, come home and sleep, then hit the road at 5am Saturday. Yes, that's early and it sucks, but if nothing else it gives me a great excuse to get my Venti Non-Fat Carmel Latte from Starbucks.
Sporting my 2XL, blue, "classic-style" leafs jersey and my rundown 10-year old Leafs cap, the wife and I took off for the United Center at 5:45 to deal with the 1 hour drive to go 14 miles in Chicago rush hour traffic and enjoy the game with Stuttering Danny and his fiance. *Note, I am nowhere close to a 2XL, but I got it at a price.... Still, it looks like I'm about 14 years old when I wear the thing and don't have a 5-o'clock shadow on my face. The cap, I realized during the game, I got almost exactly 10 years ago during my frosh year of college when Dante, Chi, and Stuttering Danny came to Minnesota to pay me a visit. I got the cap at a clearance sale @ a store in the Mall of America and I've been wearing it ever since. It's probably my most-worn hat I own. Rough guess? I'd say I've probably worn it 1,000 times since I bought it. Another rough guess? I'd say I've probably washed it once since I bought it. That's love.
(Rough shot of what the blue jersey looks like. Not exact, but you get the gist. Tim Gunn would be a fool to criticize that runway-worth piece)
As the wife and I waited outside the United Center for the other 2 in our group, I was happy and amazed by how many Leafs fans were at the game. I felt so at home knowing my Canadian brethren would be loud and proud with me at this game outside the native land (*Note: I am not actually Canadian). Very warm feeling for my first game.
This is probably a good time to answer the universal question: "Leafs fan? Why?" That's probably in the top 10% of all recurring questions asked of me. Even close friends who've known me for years and years and who have had the story explained to them already before will still pause and be like "Wait, you're a Leafs fan? How did that happen?" The basic short version is that my senior year of high school, my dad was essentially given 2 options at his company which was going through a bit of a financial tizzy: Either take a lay-off and be on your way, or take a transfer to Toronto and when it's reasonable and things settle themselves back out, we will bring you back to the states. However, there is absolutely zero time frame for this, and you may end up in Canada forever. Not wanting to let down the family, my pops took the transfer to Toronto at the start of my last year of high school. My mom and brothers and I took a visit up to see him for a weekend in October of that year and while up there, it really hit me that, yes, even though I would soon be graduating and moving away from the family anyways, there's a real distinct possibility that Toronto would be the new place I would visit if I wanted to see my family in the future. And then I told myself, "Well, let's just dive right into this thing head-first." Luckily, I fell in love with the city that trip so it didn't leave a bad taste in my mouth, and the Leafs were the big thing I took back to the states with me. And I've been a fan ever since. Go Leafs Go.
As we got into the UC, I was mother-humping starving. And since I had a shitty day at work trying to explain to old foreign women how to save something as a "favorite" on Internet Explorer (I'm seething just thinking about this again), I treated myself to a pretzel and a beer. Let me let you in on a little secret: On my travels so far, the United Center has far and away the best food. The pretzel was hot and perfectly salted (not too much, but yet, not barren). The wife got nachos which packed a mighty crunch and became addicting to eat and I ended up putting down half of her allotment. And the hot dogs there. My God, the hot dogs. They aren't any more expensive than at any other venue, but these are thick and juicy, and actually HOT. So good. If you ever find yourself at an event at the United Center in Chicago, do yourself a favor and just eat like you're a malnourished Ethiopian toddler.
Oh, and incase you're curious, the last time I was the United Center was for this. The wife's a fan, and I enjoy doing things that she likes that in turn make her want to reward me with sex. So sue me.
(That's Ryne Sandberg doing the traditional puck-drop. Cubs fan Stuttering Danny excused himself shortly afterwards and disappeared for about 10 minutes. I hope he cleaned up afterwards)
One thing that disappoints me is the Blackhawks intro video was actually so damn cool that I wanted to be able to link to it and show the world, or at least watch it at my own leisure. But for some reason, few (if any) teams (across all sports genres) post their intro videos to their games anywhere online. I find this shocking. In the age of new media and twitter and youtube and facebook clubs for teams, etc, how can you not put your video up? Intro videos actually get quite a bit of buzz after they're shown amongst fans: "Wow, that was cool. Did you see that? What part did you like?" Post them, teams. If you post them, they will watch. But for point of reference, here was their 2008-2009 video.
(Cool points to the 'Hawks for keeping a spotlight on their championship banners during the intro videos and player intros. It's very classy and cool. It's a nice tip of the cap to the team's history, without clinging to it during every waking and breathing moment.... see: Milwaukee Brewers, 1982 team or Chicago Bears, 1986 team as prime examples)
One of everyone's favorite parts of the Blackhawks experience @ the United Center is the National Anthems. A tradition there is to cheer loudly, non-stop through the US anthem. Very cool to see. It was at its best during the Winter Classic in January @ Wrigley Field. Cheering, a fighter-jet flyover, snow. Cool stuff. But me being me, I loved "Oh, Canada" on this night. One of the first things I did after really becoming a Leafs fan was to learn the words to "Oh, Canada." Even though the "Oh, Canada" is played at sporting events (notably, NHL games), when you have such a large number of Canadians in attendance cheering and singing along, it's really cool and overwhelming.
("The true north strong and freeeee....."
("Oh, Canada we stand on guard for theeeeee.")
Our seats had wait service and a great view of the ice. Pretty good seats. Pretty, pretty good. The wife did a marvelous job.
(Lovely seats)
This season has been a massive disappointment so far for the Leafs. They lost their first 8 friggin' games of the season and entered the game in dead last in the Eastern Conference. Everyone realized this was a rebuilding year for the Leafs, but we were hoping it wouldn't be a death march, either. The Leafs made a major trade in the offseason, mortgaging some future to bring in Phil Kessel, which I loved. Kessel and I are sort of kindred souls. Both from the greater Madison, WI area. Both left town to go to the University of Minnesota. Both are awesome professional athletes. But, as good as he is, he is not my favorite Maple Leaf. That would be Tomas Kaberle.
(Tomas Kaberle and the 'Hawks Patrick Kane. Kane is remarkably good and flashy. He most reminds me of the kid from D2: The Mighty Ducks who was from Texas and could dribble the puck with his stick and do all sorts of tricks and maneuvers, etc. When Kane gets moving in the open ice, you will rarely see him lose possession on a poke or anything like that.)
I do like where the Leafs are headed, though. Besides Kaberle and Kessel, I love their new goalie import Jonas "The Monster" Gustavsson, as well as my soon-to-be favorite player Viktor Stalberg when he finally gets to the big club and sees some steady playing time. The plan is in place for this Leafs team. The short-term is frustrating, though.
(NHL 94/95 for Sega, anyone?)
Oh, and to answer the question of 99.5% of the world's population: Yes, the term "Maple Leafs" is correct. They are not named after the actual leaves that fall from maple trees, but rather: "The Maple Leafs say that the name was chosen in honour of the Maple Leaf Regiment from World War I. As the regiment is a proper noun, its plural is formed by adding a simple 's' creating Maple Leafs (not *Maple Leaves)." (Tip of the cap to Wikipedia for simplifying the story).
The game got off to a quick start, with the Kane scoring unassisted on a monster slapshot just over 3 minutes into the game. That prompted the Blackhawks' goal-scoring music, which is actually cool. Since in my downtime of not watching the Leafs, I happen to follow the 'Hawks closely, I'm used to it and it didn't annoy me like it likely annoys most opposing fans. But, I can be an unbiased observer and admit that, yes, I can see how it would make one spew hatred towards a team if you heard that song over and over and over again....
Which is where the game looked like it was going early on. The Blackhawks got 2 goals in the first and scored 5 minutes into the 2nd for a 3-0 lead. By this point I had gone from wanting the Leafs to win my first game to see them play, to rather just please for the love of Mats Sundin let the Leafs score a damn goal. Luckily, Phil Kessel heard my internal wailings and put Toronto on the board with just over 2 minutes remaining in the 2nd and we headed to the 3rd period with a 3-1 game.
During the 2nd intermission, the 'Hawks always have some select fans come down, along with some sort of local or national celebrity to do a skills challenge shot-on-goal thing. The celebrity for the night was Ravi Baichwal, who happens to be a news anchor for the ABC affiliate here in Chicago. And, as it were, a native Canadian. Stand on guard, brother, stand on guard. The general template for how the 'Hawks pick their shooters for this is: Celebrity, a young boy, 2 white dads, and an attractive young woman wearing not nearly enough clothes to keep warm on the ice and nothing that shows any sort of team support. Nobody made their shots, so the intermission was not all that exciting.
Which is where the game looked like it was going early on. The Blackhawks got 2 goals in the first and scored 5 minutes into the 2nd for a 3-0 lead. By this point I had gone from wanting the Leafs to win my first game to see them play, to rather just please for the love of Mats Sundin let the Leafs score a damn goal. Luckily, Phil Kessel heard my internal wailings and put Toronto on the board with just over 2 minutes remaining in the 2nd and we headed to the 3rd period with a 3-1 game.
During the 2nd intermission, the 'Hawks always have some select fans come down, along with some sort of local or national celebrity to do a skills challenge shot-on-goal thing. The celebrity for the night was Ravi Baichwal, who happens to be a news anchor for the ABC affiliate here in Chicago. And, as it were, a native Canadian. Stand on guard, brother, stand on guard. The general template for how the 'Hawks pick their shooters for this is: Celebrity, a young boy, 2 white dads, and an attractive young woman wearing not nearly enough clothes to keep warm on the ice and nothing that shows any sort of team support. Nobody made their shots, so the intermission was not all that exciting.
(Ravi. I'm proud to know him as a Canadian, but I'll always remember him better for this....)
Kessel put up another goal 5 and a half minutes into the third period to pull the score to 3-2, but the Leafs could never quite put another threat together and tie the score. The final period was completely dominated by Toronto, but they could only muster 1 goal out of it, and even when they pulled their goalie (euphemism!!!), they couldn't even muster up a shot on goal for the final minute and a half. But the excitement of my first Leafs game and the fact that they made it pretty close kept me on the edge of my seat the entire third period. Literally. We had seats in the last row of our section so I could sit on the edge of my seat in its upright position (basically standing) and not bother anyone behind us. It was very nice. Couldn't ask for more out of my first experience. Well, I could ask for more, actually. The fuckers could have won. But yeah, pretty good night.... Pretty, pretty good.
As a post-script, the stadium post-game was still filled with Leafs fans. Just hanging out finishing their beers, cheering for no reason, threatening to have intercourse with guys' mothers, swearing, talking in thick accents, etc. It's what I felt like a county fair in Ottawa would be like, if there are county fairs in Canada. Are there? Seems like a reasonable question.
(Also, we saw a fight.)
Pre-blog intermission song for you. I actually like this one better than Andrew Gold's original. Mostly for the late near-acapella crescendo.
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After 4ish hours of sleep Friday night after the Leafs/'Hawks game, it was a rise-and-shine morning as we were heading up to Madison for an 11am kickoff for the game between the Badgers and the Michigan Wolverines. Technically there was no "shine" in the rise and shine. It's pitch black at 5am. The wife took her time waking up and getting out of bed and getting ready and packing, but we still managed to make it out of the house at a decent time and get to Madison in plenty of time for festivities. I should say this about the wife, though: when I say she took her time, it's not like she takes 2 hours to get ready or anything along those lines that you hear about so often with women and prepping, etc. But, I can be up, showered, bags packed and loaded into the car in roughly 19 minutes start to finish if need be. This is why I have the luxury of sleeping in longer than her. Sometimes in the mornings I don't think her foggy brain grasps this concept that just because I'm still sleeping in, she can too. Doesn't make me mad, just a husbandly observation.
We were quite possibly the first people in Starbucks that morning and luckily my favorite barista was mixing drinks that morning. I always pray I get her on my "Starbucks Fridays" on my way to work. This prompted a discussion with the wife: Is it reasonable/ethical to request to have a specific barista make a drink for you? Like, if my favorite coffee mixologist is working the counter taking money, am I within my right to request that she switch spots with another employee so she can be the one to make my drink? Or is that upsetting the workflow? The wife worked in a coffee shop for many years and actually had no idea how to answer. Anyone have thoughts on the matter?
With my Venti Non-Fat Carmel Latte in hand, we hit the road and made immaculate time. Stopping only in Beloit, WI (not my hometown.... I'm better than that. Yeah, I said it about Beloit. It's such a hole) to gas up and drop the dog off with my dad so he could take her for the day, we made it to Madison in just a smidgen over 2 hours.
We had to wake up our group at Capto's house and get them fired up for some pre-gaming. The wife carried my ass in beer pong that morning. I just was not on. I have my moments, but that morning was not one of them. Beer pong is also not my best game. Washers? Yes, I can handle washers. I am quite good. And I can occasionally kick ass and take names in flipcup. But beer pong? Very hit and miss. I blame my height. It's tough to get a good angle on the shots when you're so short. All my throws inevitably come in flat and like line-drives. No downward drop. It's a tall man's game. I'm nothing like these guys. Pfffff, losers. Go to class.
Our friend Creepy Kenny decided to make a fashion statement on this day. For some reason he thought it appropriate to wear women's jeans. They may have been men's, but if they were, they were the most feminine jeans I've ever seen on a male. And I have many metro/homosexual friends, so, ya know, I'm obviously an expert. But yeah, he's single, ladies. And you can double your wardrobe by dating him. Oh, and the wife also did her first keg stand of her life during the festivities. No photos will be displayed of that, though. Sorry. But she did well. 11ish whole seconds, which is the equivalent of beating a 3-year old in tennis.
We made the trek to Camp Randall Stadium, enjoying the reasonably nice weather. I love how nice this autumn has been. 50's every day. Pretty good. Pretty, pretty, pretty good. Upon entering the stadium, this was our view going to our seats:
(Nice)
(View from our actual seats. It's nice having a wife who knows people)
Let me take this moment, before I forget, to provide a defense of Rich Rodriguez. The guy is in his second season on the job. His first year was a struggle because he was a late hire and did not have any of his players in place. This year is his first year with a recruiting class and they're all going through the first year learning curve. They started this year hot, which raised people's expectations too far. If you give RichRod one more year, that should be sufficient. Give him one more year, put the number at 8 regular season wins plus be competitive in a bowl game. If he doesn't achieve those standards, then I would say a dismissal is justified. But come on. He has legit reasons for underachieving the last 2 years, and deserves one season to put all the pieces together. I mean, come on.
(Say what you want about the guy, but he deserves a fair shake.)
The game was utter domination by the Wisconsin offense. Michigan kept the game close through the first half, but the Wisconsin offense moved the ball at will throughout the game. Scott Tolzien ended up with 5 tds on his own (4 passing, 1 rush) and John Clay was all like "Hey, you wanna stop me? Stop this, cockbags!" And then he would start kicking ass and taking names Steven Seagal-style like in Under Siege (also starring Tommy Lee Jones, one of my guilty pleasure favorite actors). All in all, Wisconsin's performance this day was pretty good. Pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty good.
(This is the closest I've ever been in proximity to anyone named Zoltan. Top 1000 random observation in my life? Top 1000 random observation in my life.)
If you've read my blog regularly (and I know all 14 of you have), you know my thoughts on how important an out-of-town scoreboard is to the fan experience, and Camp Randall has far and away the best one in any stadium I've been to. It's well-located, clearly visible, constantly-updated, includes all pertinent teams, etc. It's... just.... it's the bee's knees.
(Look at that beauty on the bottom of the main scoreboard. Scores, out-of-conference teams, individual player performances... Thank you, UW.)
Our seats were actually right in the heart of Michigan's travel party, which was interesting. I've never really had an issue with Michigan or their fans. This year they were especially quiet and respectful, which may have had something to do with the fact that they were 5-5 coming into the game and facing 2 of the top teams in the conference to close out the season, thus likely missing out on a bowl game for the 2nd straight season, which hasn't happened seemingly since Lincoln freed the slaves. But yeah, that'll kinda shut you up as a fan.
The great thing about close seats is being able to observe the minutiae of the sideline goings-on. Things like:
(Tate Forcier looking frustrated while warming up... and....)
(Zoltan Mesko doing weird, never-before-seen-in-North-America stretches... and...)
(Youngest NCAA Division 1 asst. coach in the history of the world, or some coach's tag-along kid?)
The guy next to us in our packed-in seats was some portly old dude from Cuba City, WI. When the wife was away from the seat, we struck up a conversation. He liked the fact that I was from Monroe and then chuckled about his wife shopping there all the time. When I was away from the seats later, he asked the wife where the Wal-Mart was in Monroe. If there's ever a question to sum up living in small-town Wisconsin, I think we've nailed it.... "Hey, where, uh, where is the Wal-Mart in Monroe, there?"
Late in the game I was heading out to take a piss and saw the Tuba section lining up in the concourse. I love the Tuba march because it's just so simple and Tubas are fun to listen to. And say. Tuba. Tuuuuuba. Tubatubatuba. Anyways, I snapped a photo without looking too closely at the time....
(In the middle, you'll notice a guy wearing a suit. Apparently after I left they taped the words "Marry Me, Kayla" on the tubas. As they marched around the stadium, each section they went to the crowd roared but you couldn't really tell why until they got near enough for you to read it. When they finally got back down to the student section, they turned and faced them/the rest of the band and the crowd roared. All of a sudden, the guy in the suit somehow made it all the way around to the back of the band's seats and ran down an aisle and proposed to who I assume is Kayla... eeeks, hope it was her.... and she said yes and everyone cheered and it was happy happy happyhappyhappy. All told, I'll give credit. Well done, Tuba guy. That's clever, well thought-out, and came together perfectly. As my sister-law-texted the wife, "That was so cute I want to puke." Poignant. And accurate.)
The game ended and we made our way to the in-laws' car for some post-game tailgating. After some chatting and relaxing, we went out to dinner and then headed to the Kohl Center for the UW vs Alaska-Anchorage men's hockey game.
Song to get you through the 2nd intermission of the blog post. Love this song. Love it, love it, love it. Those who know me know I have a weird soft spot for quirky songs that remind you of a roller-skating party in the 70's/early 80's (songs like Luscious Jackson's "Here," Paul Oakenfold's "Starry-Eyed Suprise," Fun Lovin' Criminals "Loco" or "Bump" or "Love Unlimited", Philosopher Kings "SuperSex 69" or "Hurts To Love You." etc.... Feel free to look those up and enjoy). This is the latest addition to my arsenal.
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(Red Man!!!!.... can't go a whole weekend without seeing a spawn of Greenman(!) can we? This guy had the character down, though. His movements were impeccable. Well done, guy)
The third and final leg of the weekend sporting triathlon was the UW/Alaska-Anchorage men's hockey game. The wife got 4 decent seats from people she knows and we gave those seats to each of our parents. My mom has relatives who live in Anchorage and she's been there a few times and has gone to hockey games there, so she always enjoys seeing the Seawolves when they come to town. The wife, her sister and I got some cheapie tickets for the upper tank and sat there to start the game. Actually, despite the high level, the view was pretty good.
(Neat photo. I'm proud of myself for this one)
Thankfully we moved down near the parents in the 2nd period because there were open seats there. I've become a huuuuuge seat snob at sporting events in the last few years. I just can't tolerate bad seats for a "regular" game. If it's a huge marquee game, then I'm happy to just be in the building. But if it's a standard game, I need nice seats to enjoy it. Otherwise I'm just miserable. An incomplete list of things I'm snobby about?
1) Seats at a sporting event
2) Coffee/Coffee drinks
3) Pop Culture knowledge
4) Non-mainstream hiphop/rap music
(Ahhh... much better)
I liked the fact that during multiple intermissions of the hockey game they played Oasis' "The Shock of The Lightning," which most people remember from car commercials in recent months. I don't care what's become of the band or what people think of their work after "What's The Story....?," Oasis is badass. End of story. I will always be a fan and will always buy any music the Gallagher brothers produce.
The game itself was a massacre. The Badgers won 6-2, but probably could have put up 10 if they had scored on power plays. They went 0-8 on their power play attempts and still scored 6 goals. Insane-o. The old guy at hockey games who leads the "1-2-3, We want more!" cheers really got a workout Saturday night. And everyone in the crowd won free ice cream from Culver's because the Badgers scored 5 goals. Huzzah! My parents went to the nearest Culver's post-game and said the line was about 30 cars deep. I don't need ice cream that badly. Unless it's cookies and cream for free. In that case, I'd bike to Duluth, MN.
I also am always intrigued by the student section cheers at hockey games. The UW student section does a pretty good job. They maintain a steady chant during power plays, have a handful of one-off jeers they do at the opposing goalie and are actually pretty well-behaved. But I think my time at Minnesota kicked the holy shit out of any other student sections. I know everyone thinks that about their experiences being better than others, but I think this is true. Like, WI says "Thank you" after the PA announcer says "1 minute remaining in the period." But at Minnesota, we had a full-on dialogue with the PA guy. With 1:02 remaining, we'd go "Hey Jamie, how much time's left?" and then he'd respond with "1 minute remaining in the period." And we'd say "Thank you, Jamie!" and then he'd respond to that in various ways:
"My pleasure."
"Anything for you guys."
"Just doing my job."
"You're just too kind."
Ya know, things like that. Plus we had songs that we'd sing, other random cheers with the crowd like Min-ne-so-ta, and the student section was always "neeeeeeeee." Sounds stupid, until you're drunk and surrounded by 4,000 other 21-year olds all screaming "neeeeeeeeee" in the deepest voice they can muster. Plus @ Minnesota since there are multiple schools in the WCHA that play the Gophs each year, it's always fun to chant "Gopher Rejects" at them since they're going to smaller, shittier schools in Minnesota because they weren't good enough to go to the U. Always classy.
The best part, though, of any UW hockey experience is the mini-hockey game that happens during the 2nd intermission. They take 2 youth teams, usually in the 6-7 year-old age group, and let them go crazy on the ice. In the past the action was set to "Linus and Lucy," which adds about 1,045, 947, 393 cool points to the experience. This game (or year), they switched it to some shit-tastic dance music. Not cool, UW. Not cool. There are few things more fun and relaxing than watching 20 6-year olds skate slowly after a puck and fall down, all set to Snoopy music. Very disappointing to see that go.
(The mini-hockey kids)
(Inevitably during every mini-hockey game, the puck stays at one end for 96% of the time and one goalie ends up standing by himself for about 7 minutes. But, also inevitably during every mini-hockey game, there is one breakaway for a kid and the crowd loses their minds as he skates towards the goal. During this game, the kid made the shot and everyone was happy.)
(Final line score from the game... eeeeeeeekkkkksssss...)
With about 3 minutes left in the game, the long couple of days really hit me. I needed to sleep asap. So after the game, we headed to my family's home, and I was asleep within 28 seconds of my head hitting the pillow. All in all, a fun yet exhausting couple of days.
As a post-script, when I woke up on Sunday morning, I opened up the laptop, the a few bucks on a 4-team NFL parlay and then a couple more bucks on a 9-team NFL parlay, and didn't think much of it until 2:30 when I checked back in. I hit my first 4-team parlay to win a cool $100. A couple hours later I checked again and realized, "Holy MotherboyXXX, I just hit the first 8 games of this 9-teamer...." and then I blacked out for about 10 minutes. I came to in time to call one of my friends to hedge my bet on the last game, which I'm glad I did, because the Colts didn't cover. So I missed the big payoff from the parlay, but by hedging the bet, I was still able to make another $100 on the day. Very exciting. So, let that be the lasting lesson: Always hedge your bets. Which is basically what the 2 Badger games were for my experience for the weekend. Since the Leafs lost, the 2 UW games hedged the pain a little bit and turned the weekend into something pretty good. Pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty good.
